


Heart Attack At 23

by rhiannonhero



Category: Smallville
Genre: First Time, Futurefic, Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-10-26
Updated: 2003-10-26
Packaged: 2017-11-01 06:33:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/353167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rhiannonhero/pseuds/rhiannonhero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For Sugarrush's Tori Amos Title Challenge.  Cliche fic.  Light and fun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heart Attack At 23

_Heart Attack At 23_  
Rhiannonhero  
October 2003  


* * *

_Disclaimers_ : I do not profit in any way from my obsession with Smallville. 

_Spoilers_ : All Episodes (just to be safe). 

_Ratings Note_ : NC-17 

_Summary_ : For Sugarrush's Tori Amos Title Challenge. Cliche fic. Light and fun. 

_Acknowledgements_ : Thanks to _velvetglove_ , _pun_ , _Stone Princess_ , _ilexa_ , _mistressace_ , _edie22_ and _lucretia2_ for beta. Any lingering mistakes, etc, are mine and mine alone. Obviously, based on the number of beta readers, I'm still a big scaredy cat when it comes to comedy. 

The muses would like to thank the following musical inspiration: 

Tori Amos, _Heart Attack At 23_

_Dedication_ : To _wubba_ for her birthday. What a gift you are to the world, sweetie. 

_Feedback_ : I accept criticism as well as joyful squees. rhiannonhero@yahoo.com 

* * *

_Heart Attack At 23_

Clark's hands were slick. He rubbed them against his pants nervously while he waited. 

Of all times for Lex to be in a meeting, why did he have to be in one today? Today, when Clark had finally worked up the nerve to talk to him about something really important, something that might change the tenor of their relationship forever? Something that had been eating at Clark for the better part of a week--ever since Perry had insisted that Clark take this assignment. Little did Perry know that it hit kind of close to home. 

Darlene smiled sweetly at Clark as he waited. If the meeting hadn't been in Lex's office, she'd have shown him in there and he could've paced to his heart's content. But Lex was apparently hosting some Japanese bigwig in there, leaving Clark with no alternative but to scatter his nervous energy all over the very public reception area. 

"Are you sure you don't want some water, Clark? I can get it for you." Darlene looked at him sympathetically. 

"No. I'm fine. Thanks." 

"Just let me know if you need anything." 

Clark eyed the old man sitting across from him, squinting at the Wall Street Journal and grunting at odd intervals. He hoped that this guy wasn't here to see Lex, too, because Clark didn't think he could wait much longer. He felt like he was about to burst. And what if his proposal wasn't accepted? What if Lex tossed him out on his ear while yelling at him for being so presumptuous? 

Darlene's phone buzzed and she picked up the receiver. She turned to the old man and said, "Mr. Jackson, your son will see you now." 

The elderly man heaved himself up and tottered toward the corridor leading to the Vice President's office. "It's about damn time," he muttered under his breath. Clark winced, wondering what could have been so important that Jackson had needed to make his father wait for over an hour to see him. 

Clark dropped his head into his hands again and sighed. He stared at the floor, x-raying to the billing department below, counting the number of people actually working versus those who weren't. He rehearsed his speech in his mind for the thirty-eighth time that hour and started to question the lack of gender neutral pronouns in the English language. Then began to wonder about his own gender--did they even have 'females' on Krypton? Because if they didn't, that would explain a lot. 

Finally, the door to Lex's office swung open and Clark smiled to hear Lex speaking in fluent Japanese. It still amazed him how many languages Lex knew, despite the fact that Clark was rapidly gaining on him. Clark knew he had an unfair advantage with his bizarre Kryptonian memory. 

Lex's feet entered his line of vision and Clark noted the stresses in the leather. He grinned. Lex was wearing his lucky shoes. It must have been an important meeting indeed. 

Clark didn't look up until the elevator safely dinged with the Japanese executive's departure. What he saw made his breath catch: Lex lounging back against the receptionist's desk, looking at him with intense focus and a knowing smirk. Clark swallowed. He felt his smile skid nervously over his face and his palms broke into a fresh sweat. 

"Clark." 

Lex always said it like that. Just a statement like it was the most natural thing on earth, the most expected thing that Clark would be there--wherever 'there' might be. He said it like that when Clark sauntered into his study after work. He said it like that when Clark dropped onto the sofa next to him to join him in playing video games. He said it that way the night Clark appeared standing next to his bed after a nightmare that Lex had died. 

Clark stood up and smiled shakily. "Hey, Lex." 

Lex lifted a brow and pushed off of Darlene's desk. "Well, let's go into my office so you can tell me what's got you tied up in knots." 

Clark hoped he looked grateful despite the fact that he just felt sick. He had a bad feeling about this. It was a bad idea. It wasn't going to go well. 

Lex tossed Clark a bottle of water and sat down opposite him on the couch. Lex slid his arm along the back and looked expectantly at Clark. 

He swallowed a mouthful of water and stared at his bottle for a minute before glancing over at Lex again. He noted that Lex had loosened his tie as they'd entered the room and the single button undone at the hollow of his throat exposed soft skin that led up to Lex's adam's apple. He followed the line up to Lex's mouth which was slightly parted in anticipation. 

Clark licked his lips and met Lex's question-filled eyes. 

Lex uncoiled his bounded energy and leaned forward suddenly. "Okay, Clark, you've piqued my curiosity. Tell me what's going on." 

Clark took a deep breath and steeled himself. It could change everything--he didn't know if he was ready to do it. But he didn't really have a choice. 

"Lex, I--I want you to understand that I'd never hurt you." 

Lex's eyes went slightly darker and he leaned forward even more. "I know you wouldn't, Clark." 

Clark's hands shook a little and he knotted them in his lap before continuing, "I went to Pete first. I hope you understand that. I mean--well, we've been best friends since we were kids and I thought he'd be trustworthy. And he is--but, he--" Clark broke off when he noticed that Lex's eyes narrowed in apparent anger. 

"You told Pete first?" Lex's voice was tight. 

"Well, I _do_ live with him. He's known me since I was a kid." He stumbled along, not sure why Lex was getting angry, after all, Lex didn't even know what he was talking about, yet. 

"Sure. I understand." But Lex didn't sound like he understood. 

Clark swallowed and ploughed ahead. "Well, see, Perry is making me do it. It isn't like it's my choice, you know? But it's my first assignment and I can't turn it down." 

Lex now appeared completely confused. "Perry? Perry knows about this?" 

"Yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, he's my editor, you know." 

Lex's eyes went completely black with rage, but his voice remained very quiet. "Perry White _knows_." 

"Well, he's the one who gave me the assignment." 

"I'll kill him." 

Clark stared at Lex for a moment. It couldn't get any worse than Lex threatening to murder his editor; he might as well just lay it all out on the table. 

"I don't want you to think I'm taking advantage of you, Lex. I asked Pete to do it and he won't. He said that there was no way in hell that I could make him and so--well, there isn't anyone else that I trust. Not the way I trust you." 

"Clark, there is nothing I wouldn't do for you. Everything I have is at your disposal. You know that. You wouldn't be taking advantage of me." 

"I'm honored that you feel that way, and I know you've said that before, but this is kind of different." 

Lex leaned over and put a hand on his shoulder. The warmth of his palm burned through to Clark's skin. "Clark, please, just tell me. It's okay." 

He looked into Lex's earnest eyes and took a deep breath. "I need to you to pretend to be gay with me." 

Lex blinked once. Twice. Three times. "You what?" 

"Um, my first big article. Perry wants me to pretend to be gay and to write an article about it. You know, how gays are treated differently by the public, what it's like to be with another man as opposed to a woman--uh, not sexually, of course." 

Lex blinked at him a few more times. 

"Lex?" 

"I'm following you, Clark. I was just taken a little off guard. I thought for a moment we were talking about something else. Obviously, I was mistaken." 

Clark blushed a little. He knew exactly what Lex was referring to, but he played dumb. "So, um, I have to write the article by next week. What do you think?" 

Lex leaned back and stretched his arm across the back of the couch again. "Why me?" 

"Well, like I said, I asked Pete, but he said 'no'. You're my only other close friend. Actually, I would have asked you first, since you're bisexual and all, but I didn't want you to think I was taking advantage of your sexuality for my story. But, at this point, I'm desperate and I didn't know who else to turn to, Lex." 

Lex nodded. "I see." 

"I understand if you don't want to do this. Really. I do," Clark said nervously. "I mean, for one thing there's the media--" 

"Which we both know is perfectly aware of the fact that I have sexual relations with both women _and_ men." 

He shrugged. "I swear, Lex, I'm not trying to take advantage of you." 

Lex smiled sympathetically and reached to pat Clark's knee. "I know, Clark. I'm just thinking about my calendar for this week. How long will the 'pretending to be gay' thing take?" 

Clark broke into a grin. "Um, well, we have to go on three dates to three different venues." 

Lex stood up and sauntered across the room. "Okay. I'll help you out, Clark." Lex consulted the giant calendar on his desk. "I've got tomorrow night, Friday and Saturday free. Do those days work for you?" 

He wanted to rush Lex and hug him. Instead, he said, "Those days work just fine for me. Thank you, Lex. You're the best." 

"I know." 

Clark rolled his eyes. "Okay, well, uh--" 

Lex waved him off. "See you tomorrow, Clark." 

Just as he reached the door Lex called out, "Oh. Wear that blue sweater I got you for Christmas, okay?" 

Clark, still smiling like a fool, nodded and headed out of the office with a bounce in his step. Darlene winked at him on his way through the reception area. 

* * *

He adjusted the fall of the sweater one last time before exiting his room. Pete sat on the sofa stuffing handfuls of popcorn into his mouth and watching the recent remake of _Friday The Thirteenth_. 

"Hey, Clark, man, you look pretty spiffy. What's the occasion?" 

"Uh--I've got a date." 

Pete sat up straight and eyed Clark like he'd grown a third head. "A date." 

Clark lifted his chin defiantly. "Yeah. What's so hard to believe about that?" 

"Oh, you know, just the fact that you haven't had a date for over two years. You know, since Lana took off for France." 

He shrugged. "Well, you know, maybe I was just waiting for the right person." 

Pete's eyes widened and Clark was relieved to hear the doorbell. Now he just had to get out of the apartment without Pete realizing it was Lex picking him up for their 'date'. 

He rushed down the hall and pulled open the door. Wow. Lex was--wow. 

Lex wore a long coat that emphasized the length of his legs and a lavender sweater that hugged his form. Clark took a deep breath and regretted it when his sensitive nose picked up the scent of Lex's cologne. God, Lex smelled good enough to eat. 

Then there was Lex's smile, the one that was sharp and bright and cut through to Clark's core, choking him with lust tempered by a healthy dose of obsession and love. 

He remembered Pete too late as the door jerked out of his hand, flung aside so that Pete could get a look at the 'person worth waiting for'. 

Clark blushed as Pete burst out laughing. "Oh, come _on_ , Clark. Why didn't you just tell me you'd rounded Lex up to fake date you? Gotta hand it to you though, you had me going for a second, thought you'd finally met a girl." 

He jostled Pete back into the apartment. "Thanks for your input, Pete. Have a nice night with Freddie or Michael Myers or whoever the hell--" He shut the door on Pete's laughter and turned back to Lex who was smirking with lifted brows. 

Clark shrugged. "I, uh, sort of let him believe I had a real date." 

Lex nodded. "Well, you do. If we don't treat it like the real thing, then you won't really know, will you?" 

He tried to smile. "Yeah. I guess." 

Lex grinned momentarily. "Relax, Clark. I don't bite. Well, not on the first date." 

Clark chuckled. "Sure. I bet you bite given the first opportunity." 

Lex leaned forward as though he were going to kiss Clark. Time slowed and Clark's breath stopped entirely. Lex gently nipped Clark's lower lip. 

"You're right. I do." 

Lex turned on his heel, heading for the street and the slate-grey Porsche waiting there. 

* * *

Over dinner, he and Lex didn't really garner any more interest than they normally did. A few curious stares, mainly due to the fact that Lex was--well, Lex Luthor, Metropolis' native son and multi-billionaire. There were the usual skeptical faces when the other diners took in Clark, everyone was aware that Lex's tastes ran both ways. But it wasn't until Lex fed Clark a bite of his dessert that everyone sat up and took notice. 

"Uh, Lex?" Clark shifted uncomfortably as seemingly the entire room focused attention on their table. 

"Yes?" 

"Why did you do that?" 

Lex smiled. "Well, you have to know what it's like to be gay, right? Well, that's what happens if you behave like a normal couple in public. If I were Lana, would all of these people be peering at us over their wine glasses right now?" 

Clark shook his head. 

"Make notes, young padawan." 

He rolled his eyes. "Back away from the Star Wars references slowly, Lex." 

Lex leaned in close and whispered, "Obi Wan was gay, you know." 

Clark looked up skeptically. "Bullshit." 

"No. It is common knowledge that he was fucking his--" 

Clark shook his head, hand coming up to clap over Lex's open mouth. "Okay, okay. I believe you. Don't tarnish my innocence any more tonight, okay?" 

Lex's eyes smoldered suddenly and Clark was intimately aware of the soft, wet lips against his palm. He pulled his hand away, quickly rubbing it against his pants. 

Lex smiled. "Hmm. That almost sounds like a challenge that I should accept, rather than a warning I should heed." 

Clark reached for his water and gulped several mouthfuls. He looked back up into Lex's eyes and found them laughing at him now. He flushed. "You should be satisfied with having made me blush twice tonight, already, okay?" 

Lex leaned back in his chair and Clark distinctly felt a socked foot inching up his ankle under his pants leg. "But you know I'm never satisfied, Clark. I always want more." 

Clark jerked his leg away and wiped his mouth with his napkin, pushing back from the table. "I'm going to the restroom." 

Lex's expression shifted from playful to hurt before shuttering completely. "Sure." 

Clark weaved through the tables until he reached the men's room. He pushed through the door and stood in front of the mirror staring at his reflection. The blue sweater emphasized the green of his hazel eyes, his dark hair was a little messy and he tried to use some water to smooth it down to no avail. His face was flushed and he tossed some cold water against his cheeks. No good. He still looked like he was just propositioned by his sexy best friend, and he still looked like he was dying to say 'yes'. 

But was that what had happened? After all, Lex was just pretending, right? Trying to make Clark's experience as realistic as possible for his story? But--it had seemed so real. The look on Lex's face as he'd stroked his firm foot up Clark's calf. Jesus. The nip on the lip at the door. Clark thought he could jerk off just thinking of that moment for months. Maybe years. 

But Lex had never made a move on him. Not once in all the years they had been friends. And Lex wasn't someone who just stood back and let what he wanted pass him by--no, if he'd wanted Clark, he would've had him by now. The simplest logic told Clark that Lex wasn't interested and never had been. Lex couldn't help it if he flirted with pianos and desks and pool cues--and he also couldn't help it if he flirted with Clark. It was just who Lex was, part of his charm. 

No matter that it was a horrible tease and terribly painful for the dorky best friend who was in love with him. Lex didn't know about that anyway. 

Besides, there were so many lies in the way. Even if Lex _did_ feel something beyond friendship for him, how could he, in good conscious, enter into a relationship without telling Lex the truth. And how many times over the years had Lex made it clear that the people who lied to him were never, ever forgiven. Lex thrust them from his life without even an audience for explanations. And Clark had lied so many times. In so many ways. About so many things. 

And Lex was always dating someone. This was the first time in years that he'd gone any length of time without a steady--something. A steady girlfriend, a steady fuck. Clark hated each and every one of them with the passion of a thousand suns, but he always made nice and pretended to like her, or him. _That_ was the worst. When Lex dated men, Clark wanted to curl up and die. What was wrong with him? What didn't Lex see in him? 

It was all muddled confusion and conflicting desires. To keep Lex safe, to keep the secret, to protect the friendship, to protect his own ego--so many reasons that Clark had never pursued his interest in Lex. It was time for a reality check. 

Clark studied his reflection and whispered aloud, "Here's the deal, Lex. If you wanted me, you would've had me by now. Logic tells me, therefore, that you must not want me--no matter what your eyes say or how much you tease me. And if you knew the truth, you'd hate me. Besides, it's dangerous and if I let myself believe, for even a second--" Clark shook his head. "Great, I've gone insane." 

He wiped his hands and turned to go, only to find Lex standing in the doorway watching him. Clark inhaled sharply in surprise. "How long have you been there?" 

Lex's head tilted slightly and he studied Clark for a moment. "Not long." His voice was quiet. "Come on, Captain, my Captain, why don't I take you home?" 

Clark tried to smile. He failed miserably. "Lead on, MacDuff." 

Lex winced. "Ouch. Mixed references. That was actually painful." 

He managed to chuckle. "Sorry. Let's go." 

Lex led the way to the car and only when Clark was buckled in did Lex turn and say, "Clark, if you feel like this was a mistake, we can stop right now. We're just pretending after all, right?" 

He nodded. "Yeah. No. I mean, let's keep going. I have to write this damn story." 

Lex swallowed and Clark thought for a moment that he looked hurt. "Yes, can't forget about the story." 

Tires squealed as they roared out of the parking lot. 

* * *

"So, man, how was your fake date with Lex last night?" Pete asked around a mouthful of cereal. 

Clark shrugged. 

"Where did he take you? Some place nice?" 

Clark nodded. "Well, not too nice. Just a typical place, actually. The same place Lex and I usually go." 

Pete nodded and shoved in another spoonful of cereal. His hand waved absently toward the phone. "There's a message over there for you. Lana called from France. Wants you to call her back." 

Clark froze and looked at the phone like it might bite. "Lana?" 

Pete gave him a look and spoke slowly, implying that he was either hard of hearing or retarded. "La-Na. Your ex-girl-friend. Lives in France now. Called you. Wants you to call her back." Pete made some hand gestures to illustrate dialing a phone. 

"Cute, Pete." 

Pete rolled his eyes. "I told her that you were on a date with Lex. She didn't take that too well." He laughed. "Serves her right after the way she dumped you." 

Clark whispered, "She didn't dump me, Pete." 

"I know, I know. It was 'mutual' and all that horse hooey. Whatever, man, we can pretend anything you want to pretend." Pete looked up at him then and held up a warning finger. "Except that we're gay together. We can't pretend that." 

Clark ignored him. Pete was right; the break up hadn't been mutual. Clark had ended it; despite the impression that everyone else seemed to have that Lana was the one to put their relationship out of its misery. 

The fact of the matter was, after two years together, Clark couldn't get it up for her. He was gay. He'd figured that much out when he could get a hard-on just thinking of Lex in a swimsuit, but Lana's mouth on his cock didn't do much to stir him beyond being half-hard. Finally, he'd just given up. It wasn't fair to her. She deserved someone who wanted all of her. 

Lana hadn't wanted to give up, though. She was convinced that if she just tried harder.... 

God. It had been so painful. And now she was calling him. Shit. 

"Are you gonna call her?" 

Clark looked at his watch. It was nearly two in the afternoon in Paris. "Uh, I think she's probably still at work." 

Pete narrowed his eyes. "Clark?" 

"Yeah, Pete?" 

"If you want me to just tell her to take a flying leap, I will." 

He smiled. "Thanks, buddy. But I don't need your protection. I'll call her a little later." 

Pete nodded. "All right. You're the boss." 

Clark grabbed a travel cup and poured a coffee to go. "I've got to head out. Gonna be late again as it is." 

Pete waved him off as he poured more cereal. 

The bus was crowded and Clark had to stand, holding onto a strap to keep from falling over every time the mammoth lurched to a halt. He hated public transportation. He supposed that he should be more philosophical about it. He should look at it as an opportunity to study mankind more closely and, as a journalist, being in touch with the common man was imperative. Still, the bus stank, it was loud, it was slow and the people all jostled him with pointy elbows and knees. Not that the pointy parts hurt him, it was just annoying. 

Lex was always offering to buy him something to drive. Sometimes Clark thought he should take him up on it. 

Speaking of Lex, Clark didn't know what to do about the night before. He had no idea how much or how little of his conversation with the mirror Lex might have overheard. The last thing he wanted Lex to know was how he felt about him. He had hidden his lust and burgeoning love for years and he planned to keep it that way. Their friendship was too important to him to blow over something like-- 

Clark sighed and sipped his coffee. Something like the love of his life? Was there ever anything that was more worth taking a risk for? And the way Lex had looked at him last night--that had been more than just friendly, right? He wasn't imagining it, was he? He recalled his conversation with the mirror and shook his head. Still, in the light of morning, he wanted to believe in something positive, something hopeful. All he needed was a sign, something to tell him to go for it. 

He cursed under his breath as the bus slammed to a halt and the travel cup managed to hiccup a stain on his white shirt. Not exactly the sign he was looking for. 

Clark was still dabbing at his shirt with his tie as he made his way across the newsroom towards his desk. 

"Spill, Smallville." 

Clark looked up to meet the slate grey eyes of his worst nightmare, good friend and partner, Lois Lane. "Spill? Yeah, spilled coffee on myself." 

Lois shook her head and pointed at his desk, directing his eyes towards the bouquet of wildflowers decorating the corner. "Spill." 

Clark stumbled toward his desk. "There must be some mistake--" 

"Nope. I double checked the card. It clearly says 'Clark Kent' on the outside of the envelope." 

He eyed her and muttered, "And what does it say on the _inside_ of the envelope." 

"Open it and find out, doofus." 

Clark sighed and slipped open the card, his heart pounding somewhere in the vicinity of his throat. 

_Normally, I'd send roses. But you were never the roses kind of guy. So here's something to remind you of the summers in Smallville. Yours, Lex_

He stared at the note, fully aware that his mouth was hanging open. 

"Well, Smallville, what the hell is your so called 'best buddy' Lex Luthor doing sending you flowers? Hmm? Did you get laid last night?" 

He gaped at the flowers and the card, Lois' crude words barely filtering through his shock. Finally he got it together enough to whisper, "No. No, of course not." 

Lois ducked her head trying to meet his eyes. "Yeah? Then what's it about?" 

"You know that story Perry gave me about being gay in America." 

"Yeah?" 

"Well, Lex and I are pretending to be gay for the article." Clark thought he'd probably be a lot more convincing if he wasn't still gaping at the flowers and basically looking like a love struck puppy. 

"Well, that shouldn't be too hard to do--considering the fact that _you are both gay_." Lois rolled her eyes and sat down at her desk next to Clark's. "When you're ready to fess up to getting fucked like a newlywed last night, you just let me know." 

Clark glared at her. "Lex and I are just friends, you pervert." 

"Yeah. And I didn't sleep with my calculus professor to get that 'A'." 

He sighed and sat down at his desk, shoved the vase to the back of his desk and tried to get to work. While trying to transfer his notes from his date with Lex to his computer, he found his eyes continually wandering back to the flowers. 

After a few hours, Lois stopped typing at the speed of light and stretched. She turned to him and said, "You know, you're supposed to call and thank the guy for the flowers. It's just common courtesy. Even if you are just 'pretending' to be gay." 

Clark wished he could bang his head on the desk. Of course. How could he have been so stupid? He dialed Lex's direct number. He wasn't surprised when Lex picked up on the second ring. 

"Lex, um, hey." 

"Clark." And there it was again, Lex just saying his name like _of course_ Clark would be calling him. 

"I, uh, I guess--well, wow. Flowers." 

Lex chuckled. "I hope you like them." 

Clark blushed. "Oh, well, yeah. Of course. They're great." 

"Good." 

Regaining some of his equilibrium, Clark continued, "I just have one question." 

"Shoot." 

"What makes you think I'm not the 'roses kind of guy'?" 

Lex was silent for a moment on the other end of the line and Clark worried that he'd said the wrong thing. He was just getting ready to apologize and reassure Lex that he really did like the flowers when Lex responded. 

"You told me when you took Chloe to the Spring Formal your freshman year that you thought it was silly that girls always expected roses just for going on a date. You said that you weren't a 'roses kind of guy' and that you preferred wild flowers over any of the hothouse varieties." 

Clark was speechless for a moment. "You--you remember that all the way from high school?" Clark did the fast math. He was twenty-three now; that was seven years. 

"Yes." 

"I'm--well, damn, Lex, I'm impressed." 

Lex ignored the comment and asked, "So, what time should I pick you up tomorrow evening?" 

Clark consulted his calendar. "Well, I think any time after six works for me." 

Lex spoke softly to someone and then replied. "I'll pick you up at seven." 

"Why don't I pick you up?" 

Lex laughed. "On the bus?" 

He sighed. "Good point." 

"You know, that's a good idea, actually, Clark. Why don't you pick me up at seven." 

They finished up the call quickly. After replacing the phone, Clark put his head in his hands. 

"What's wrong, Kent?" 

"I'm an idiot. I just gave up riding in a Porsche to take Lex out on a date using public transportation." 

Clark groaned at Lois' wicked laughter. 

* * *

He knocked on the penthouse door. Normally, he'd just walk in, but this was a special occasion and so his key card was still tucked into his wallet. 

Lex opened the door and Clark caught his breath. All black, open collar--just fucking sexy as hell. 

Lex stepped back. "Clark, come in." 

He thrust out his offering, a stem of white orchids. 

"I guess it's my turn to be impressed." 

Clark shrugged. "I hope you like it." 

Lex smiled softly as he took the stem from Clark. "You know I do." 

Clark's heart flipped. 

"So, are you coming in?" 

Clark grinned and stepped through the door into the-- 

Very unfamiliar penthouse. 

The normally bright rooms glowed with low lighting and gentle music played in the background. Lex ushered Clark into the candle-lit dining room, a place in which Clark had never actually eaten, gesturing towards the meal that was spread out there. 

"So, we can eat this dinner, prepared especially for us by Gretchen, or we can go eat pizza at whatever hole in the wall you intended to drag me into." 

Clark swallowed. "This is--uh, unexpected." 

"It's what I'd do if you were really my date." 

"Trying to get your date into bed with Seduction 101, Lex?" 

"There's a reason that the course starts out with these techniques, Clark." Lex suddenly leaned against Clark and the next words were whispered into Clark's ear. "They work every time." 

Clark gulped and tried to clear his head. Perry had specifically requested that Clark report on the public reactions to homosexuals, and, last time Clark checked, there was no public to react in Lex's dining room. He thought about it only briefly before gesturing toward the plates. "Sure. Uh, let's eat here. I'd hate to waste anything that Gretchen made." 

"I think that's a wise decision, Clark." 

Clark's stomach flipped. Lex was definitely flirting with him. Lex was definitely looking at him like he was the main course. Oh. God. Maybe, just maybe-- 

Lex put the orchids into his water glass and then settled into a seat. He indicated that Clark should sit next to him rather than across the table. "So that I can see you better." 

Clark did as he was asked, but he didn't think that the position afforded a better view. Perhaps a better angle to--oh. 

Yeah, unquestionably a better angle for Lex to put a hand on Clark's thigh, for example. 

He took a deep breath and tried to carry on a normal conversation, but he had no clue how Lex responded to his questions or what replies he made to Lex's inquiries. All he could focus on was Lex's hand resting on his thigh, slowly stroking the inseam of his pants. He was so hard that his eyeballs ached. 

"Clark?" 

"Huh? Sorry, Lex. I was--thinking. What did you say?" 

Lex smiled slowly. "I asked if you wanted me to suck you off now." 

"What?" Clark choked. 

Lex smirked. "Joke, Clark." 

"Oh. Oh--Jesus, Lex." Clark tried to smile. "You're a tease." 

Lex's eyebrow went up at that. "Would you like me to, Clark? You know, for the full effect? For the article?" 

He garbled. He didn't know what he said or if it was English, but there was noise. 

Then there was motion and movement and some sounds like a zipper being undone and fuck-- 

His cock was in Lex's mouth. 

_His cock was in his best friend's mouth_. 

"Oh. Fucking. God." 

Lex chuckled and the vibration sent Clark's head slamming back against the high backed chair. Wet, hot slurping and Clark felt the unholy rush of orgasm starting in the base of his spine. Lex's tongue twisted over the head of Clark's cock and flicked at the slit-- 

"I can't--Lex, stop." Clark grabbed at Lex's shoulders and pushed. "Please, stop." 

Lex drew away, his eyes lowered and his lips swollen. "Clark--" His voice was a wreck. "I'm sorry. I went too fa--" 

Clark pulled him up before he could say any more and kissed him. Lex felt stiff, but only for a moment. Then he was pawing at Clark, tearing into his shirt with greedy fingers, licking at Clark's mouth and neck, jerking Clark's head back with a handful of hair so that he could reach under Clark's chin. 

Violent, desperate need wracked him and Clark only realized they were on the floor under the dining room table when he opened his eyes and saw the slats of wood over his head. 

Lex moved over him like a feral thing, ripping away Clark's clothes and exposing skin to be sampled with tongue and teeth. Clark moaned as his nipples were bitten roughly and then licked with tender care. His hands skimmed over Lex's head as Lex moved over Clark's chest, down his belly and sucked the head of Clark's cock in between his lips. 

Clark's head rolled back and forth on the floor as Lex sucked him, his cock jerking and twitching helplessly when Lex teased with his tongue. And then he was in deep, the back of Lex's throat the only barrier to being buried to the hilt and the angle didn't allow for swallowing. Clark held the back of Lex's head, fingers caressing the soft skin as he lightly pumped his hips. It was too good. 

So much better than Lana. Even better than that Jeff guy from his biology lab during freshman year. 

"Lex--Lex--Lex--" Clark chanted the name that always came to his lips when he approached orgasm and then dropped his hand away, allowing Lex the freedom to pull off. "I'm gonna come." 

Lex made a sound in his throat like Clark had broken him. 

Clark tensed and cried out, spilling into Lex, and Lex eagerly swallowed his essence down. Clark shuddered through orgasm, jerking and balling his hands into fists to keep from hurting Lex with his grip. 

He didn't even have time to enjoy the moment before the sweaty aftermath crashed in around him and Clark felt fear rising in his gut. Oh God. What had they done? 

Lex climbed up his body, gazed into Clark's eyes for a long moment and smiled. "It's okay, Clark. It's really okay." Lex touched his face. "Don't panic." 

"Lex--" 

"Shh. We'll talk later." 

Lex began to climb out from under the table when Clark realized that Lex hadn't come. He started to reach for him, to drag him back to reciprocate pleasure for pleasure when he realized. They were pretending. Lex didn't really want him. It was-- 

Oh God. It had been out of pity. He'd heard the conversation with the mirror and-- 

"Clark? I said don't panic." 

Lex reached a hand under the table and, after Clark had fastened his pants again and adjusted what was left of his shirt, he allowed Lex to guide him out. 

"Lex--" Clark stood shakily, looking into the hooded eyes of his best friend, the man he'd loved since he was a kid. "Why?" 

Lex swallowed hard, sadness crossing his features and then his face cleared up instantly. "For the article, of course." 

For the article. 

Of course. 

* * *

The next morning, Clark slept late, hoping that if he could just keep sleeping then he wouldn't have to deal with the reality of what had happened with Lex. 

Eventually, though, Pete was banging on the door telling him that Lana was on the phone, long-distance from France. 

Clark rolled over and picked up his extension. 

"Hello?" 

"Clark! I'm so glad to finally get a hold of you!" 

"Lana, hey. What's up? How's Paris?" 

"Paris is unbelievable. It is so gorgeous, Clark. I wish you were here to see it." 

"Some day." Clark didn't tell her that he'd been to Paris a couple of times now. That would require explaining certain things--like how he was an alien who could fly. He didn't really want to get into that this morning. 

"How _are_ you, Clark? Pete said you were dating Lex now? I had been hoping you guys would get together." 

He was silent for a moment as the prior night cascaded through his mind and then Lana's words sank in. "What? What are you talking about?" 

"You and Lex. I finally understand, Clark. I mean, I realized before Pete even told me and it is really okay. I'm just relieved to know it wasn't me." 

He was stunned and unsure which aspect of the conversation to address first. "Lex and I aren't--" 

"Don't bother denying it, Clark. I'm proud of you. Good for you. Good for both of you!" 

"Right. Lana, listen. Really, Lex and I aren't a couple." 

Lana was silent for a moment and then she said softly, "If that's true, Clark, then what the hell are you waiting for?" 

He sighed and rolled over onto his back. "It isn't that simple." 

"Yeah? Well, nothing good ever is!" 

Clark made a noncommittal noise. "So, what's up? Why the long-distance call?" 

Lana made a happy noise and he rolled his eyes. He knew before she even said it. "I'm in love! I'm getting married!" 

"Isn't this kind of sudden?" 

"Clark, don't sound like Nell, okay? Just be happy for me." 

He sighed and scrubbed his face. "I'm happy for you, Lana. Tell me all about him." 

He listened as Lana rhapsodized over her new love and tried not to think of a hot mouth on his cock or the way Lex's lips had tasted. 

Fuck. Why did he have to be in love? 

* * *

Lois stared at him relentlessly over the cup of coffee. The diner was noisy with Saturday late-risers eating breakfast and drinking coffee. 

"So, Kent, what's the problem?" Her eyes grew sharper. "Wait. Is this about Luthor?" 

Clark shrugged and squirmed restlessly. "I--Listen, Lois. I'm not a story, okay? Can this just be between friends?" 

Lois waved a hand in the air to indicate he should continue. 

"Seriously, Lois." 

"What? You want a sworn affidavit? My first born child? What?" 

"Your word." 

Lois rolled her eyes. "You have my word, Kent. Now talk." 

"Okay, well, here's the thing." Now that he was here and now that she'd promised, Clark didn't know where to begin. He wasn't good at confiding in people. 

"You slept with him." 

"No! Well, kind of--well, maybe." 

"Maybe?" 

"Depends on your definition of 'slept with'. I mean, there was no sleeping and, uh, we--" Clark blushed. "Well, uh, we didn't do _everything_." 

"What did you do?" 

"Lois!" 

"Listen, Kent, I don't need details--I just need to know what happened if I'm going to be of any help to you." 

Clark studied her, suspicious that she was just being nosy and voyeuristic, but he had to admit that she couldn't give him advice if she didn't know the whole story. 

"Well, see--God this is embarrassing." 

"Why? I already know what you want to do with him." 

"Lois! Oh my God!" 

"You are such a prude, Smallville." 

Clark sighed and closed his eyes. Maybe it would be easier if he wasn't looking at her. "On our first 'date' he bit my lip as a joke, kind of, and things just sort of escalated from there. On the second date--we--he--" e took a deep breath. "He sort of offered to suck me--" he whispered, "--and I sort of agreed or something. And then we were kissing and stuff happened, really good stuff, and suddenly he stopped, climbed out from under the dining room table--" 

"Wait. You were under the dining room table? Well, that changes the whole picture I was creating in my head." Lois' eyes took on a gleam. "Wow, that's hot." 

"Lois--" Clark glared at her. "You aren't helping me." 

"Right. Sorry. So, uh, the problem is that he just stopped?" 

"Yeah. I guess. I mean, he said he did it for the article." 

"Yes. Of course he did." Lois snorted. 

"What? You don't believe him?" 

Lois shook her head sadly. "No. I don't. And you do?" 

Clark groaned. "No. I guess not. I mean, no. I just don't know why he ended it so quickly." 

Lois took a long swallow of coffee. "Were you freaking out?" 

_Don't panic, Clark. It's okay_. 

"Ummm, maybe?" 

"Oh. So maybe he thought he'd done some real damage to your friendship and wanted to back off quickly, blame it on the article and re-enter the happy land of denial you guys have been dwelling in for years. Ever thought of that?" 

"Well--huh. Maybe. But how could he think that? I mean, I kissed him back! I--I had an _orgasm_ for God's sake!" 

Lois' eyebrows lifted eagerly. "Oh really? And how did this orgasm come about?" 

"Lois." 

"Rubbing? Sucking? Hands?" 

"Lois!" 

"Okay, so here's the deal, Smallville. You're going to have to come clean with him. Be honest. Tell him everything." 

Clark sighed and looked into his coffee. If only Lois understood what 'coming clean' meant and how much 'telling everything' entailed. 

* * *

Lex wasn't answering his cell phone and, for one of the few times in the history of their relationship, his secretary was offering to take messages instead of putting him through. 

Clark sat in front of the television set, but he didn't even bother to turn it on. He could hear Pete in his bedroom singing along to some old Remy Zero song that Clark vaguely remembered had been Chloe's favorite during their freshman year of high school. 

God, that seemed so long ago now. So much had happened since then. So much was still happening and why couldn't the changes just stop for a little while? If it wasn't realizing that he was in love with Lex, it was graduating college, starting a new job, breaking up with Lana. And if it wasn't something even remotely normal, it was meteor mutants, sub-zero breath or _flying_ , for God's sake. 

Clark reached for his laptop and propped his feet up on the coffee table. He powered the computer up and watched as his custom background lit up the screen. A picture from college graduation--Pete, Chloe, Lana, Clark and Lex, who stood off to the side, looking uncomfortable, but still smiling as Clark's mom had requested of him. Clark touched the screen with his index finger, tracing Lex's smile and remembering the sweet slide of Lex's skin under his hands. 

Why wasn't Lex answering the phone? 

Pete's door slammed open and he came bounding down the hall, dancing to his own inner music. He stopped and did a little gyration before continuing toward the front door. 

"Don't wait up, Clark, man. Got a _hot_ date. Mm-mmm. I might not be back tonight." 

He laughed as Pete checked himself out in the mirror on the back of the door, hung there by Chloe when they first moved in, as an attempt to get Clark to pay more attention to his clothes before he left home. 

Pete grinned at his reflection and did a fast spinning dance move. "Looking good! Catch you later, man!" 

Clark turned back to his computer as the door slammed. He sighed and looked at the phone sitting forlornly beside him. He picked it up and scrolled through the caller ID for the third time; Lex's number still wasn't there. 

He shook his head. Time to get to work. He had an article to write and he might as well write it now. There obviously wasn't going to be a third date. Clark opened a Word document and typed the first thing that came to mind. 

*I knew from the beginning that this was a very bad idea. From the time my editor suggested it, until I lost my best friend, I suspected that pretending to be gay for an article on homosexuality in America would backfire on me. Mostly because I am actually gay and so is my best friend. And I'm sort of in love with him. I think he loves me, too, but now I'll never know because I screwed it all up. * 

After reading what he'd typed, he knew this wasn't an article. Clark closed his eyes and let his thoughts flow. 

_I never expected that he cared for me, too. I should have. I'm an idiot and I see that now. I guess I didn't want to see it because of all the other stuff. The things that I can't share with him, the things that I know he'll demand of me and, because I love him, I'll lie to him. He'll never know or understand that it's because I love him that I lie to him. He would never agree that not knowing keeps him safe. He believes in the rules his father taught him. "There is no such thing as too much information, Clark." How many times has he told me that?_

Clark read over his words and sighed. This was pointless. Lex didn't deserve the lies, the evasions. A relationship with him would be impossible. 

He looked around the empty apartment and made up his mind. He would go out. He would have fun. He would write the goddamn article tomorrow and he would not, absolutely would not, allow himself to think of 'could have been's and 'would have been's. He'd ambush Lex at his office on Monday and beg for forgiveness, do whatever it took to go back to being friends. Lex was too important to let go, but he couldn't hang around this apartment brooding or he would go insane. 

He set the computer aside, grabbed the phone and dialed. 

"Lois? Do you have any plans tonight? I need to go out. I don't want to talk about it, but I want a distraction." 

* * *

Clark felt good, considering. The alcohol he'd downed definitely created a nice numb feeling where his heart and soul continued to ache for Lex, his other half. Lex was out there somewhere, probably making a half-way crooked business deal or fucking someone just to prove that he didn't love Clark. His other half did stuff like that. And, right now, floating on too many shots of Jack to count, Clark found it oddly endearing. 

"S'cause he loves me." He said to Lois as they pulled up to his apartment complex. "He just does it 'cause he loves me." 

Lois gazed at him in concern, a rare look for her. "You okay, Smallville? Need my help up the stairs? I'll hold your hair back while you puke, if you want." 

Clark chuckled. "M'okay. I can make it." He bumped his head rather hard against the door as he climbed out. He laughed and then remembered to say, "Ow. That hurt." 

Lois leaned across the gear shift and peered up at him. "Are you sure you don't want me to come up, Clark? I am a damn good nurse when I need to be." 

"Nah. Go on home, Lois. S'okay." 

Clark felt the urge to kiss her, so he did. No use being drunk if you couldn't just do what you wanted when you wanted to do it. He leaned into the car and held her head, kissing her affectionately. 

When he pulled away, Lois looked stunned, her hand going to her lips to gently touch where he'd kissed her. "Damn, Smallville. I don't know what the hell Luthor's problem is if you kissed him even half as well as you kissed me--" 

Clark grinned. "Told you, Lois. He loves me. So, you know, he's scared and he's got to go bye-bye for awhile until he can deal." 

"You are so trashed." 

"Yeah. I don't regret kissing you, though." 

Lois smirked. "I'll call you in the morning to make sure you didn't die of alcohol poisoning." 

He found that hysterical for some reason and he began laughing hard, banging his head again as he backed out of the car. He slammed the door shut and waved Lois off before tottering up the stairs to his apartment. The lights were on in the living room. 

"Heh. Guess Pete didn't get lucky tonight after all. Loser." Clark started laughing again. "Loser! Ha! That's me! I'm the loser!" 

He couldn't seem to get the key to work in the lock and was relieved when the door seemed to just come open. Clark shut the door behind him, fumbling with the locks and finally getting them latched. 

"Pete! I'm home! Guess what? I'm a _loser_ , man! A damn, freaky _loser_!" 

Clark, still laughing, stumbled down the hall and into the living room. 

Lex. 

On the couch. 

With Clark's computer. 

Staring at Clark like he was--a damn, freaky loser. 

Oh. Fuck. 

"Lex." 

"Hey, Clark." Lex sat the computer down on the coffee table and stood slowly. "You look like you've been drinking." 

Clark's heart pounded. "Yeah. Lots of drinks. Can't remember how many. So many." 

Lex nodded. "I take it that you didn't get lucky." 

"Huh?" 

"Well, you just announced to Pete, who isn't here by the way, that you are a big loser. So, I take it that you didn't 'score'." 

He couldn't stop the laughter. "Score? Me? That's funny, Lex." 

Lex frowned. "Why is that funny, Clark? You're an attractive, intelligent man." 

Clark moved tentatively forward. "Lex? Why are you here?" 

Lex stepped around the couch. "I'm here for our third date. I'm sorry that I didn't come over sooner. It looks like I missed out on a good time." 

He frowned and swayed a little on his feet. "Just a little reminder, Lex, we had sex in your dining room last night and then you freaked out on me." 

"I know, Clark. I'm sorry." 

The room shifted violently and Clark wondered how long it would take his system to flush the alcohol out. He reached out to steady himself and his hand landed on Lex's shoulder. 

Lex gripped Clark's forearm. "Clark? Are you okay?" 

"So drunk, Lex. So confused." He closed his eyes and then opened them again. Lex's face reflected too many emotions that Clark couldn't catch them fast enough to catalogue them all--worry, confusion, love. He knew what love looked like; he'd seen his parents look at each other and that was just how Lex was looking at him. 

"Let's get you to your room, Clark." 

Clark shrugged. He allowed Lex to lead him to his bedroom and he sat down on the side of his bed, kicking off his shoes and socks, pulling off his t-shirt. It smelled like cigarettes and alcohol, both very unappetizing scents at the moment. 

"Shower. I need a shower." 

Lex sat down next to him on the bed. "Clark? Can we talk?" 

Clark stood up and unzipped his jeans, walking unsteadily toward the bathroom. "I'm gonna shower." 

Lex didn't follow and Clark shucked his jeans and boxers, nearly falling against the door jamb as he kicked them off. 

"Jesus, Clark. How much did you drink? I've never seen you like this." 

"S'cause I'm afraid of what I'll say to you when I'm drunk," he called over his shoulder as he turned on the tap and tested the heat of the water, more from habit than necessity. 

Clark stumbled over the edge of the tub as he tried to get into the shower and he caught himself on the tiles, laughing. "Whoa. Nearly broke the bathroom." 

He jerked when he felt Lex's hand on his back. "Clark, steady now. I don't want you to fall and bust your head." Lex's voice was low as his hand trailed down to just above Clark's buttocks. "Take it from me, head injuries are no fun." 

Clark glanced behind him. The shower curtain was pulled aside, showing that Lex had his shirt off, all long muscles and pale skin, the water already misting his chest. Clark closed his eyes. "Don't Lex. Last night, you took me higher than I've ever been before and then you just dropped me. So low--so low, Lex. And I keep telling myself that it's better this way, but I can't really make myself believe that because of how I feel about you, so then I went out and got as drunk as I could, had so many drinks, so many and now I'm going to puke." Clark dropped down to his knees and retched, but nothing came up. "Huh. Well, maybe not." 

Lex stroked his back in soothing motions. "God, Clark. I had no idea." 

Clark just shrugged, sat back and tucked his face into his knees, the shower pelting his shoulders and head, running down his face and funneling down his chest. Distantly he heard the clicking sound of shampoo being opened and then Lex was washing his hair, strong fingers massaging his scalp and brushing the suds back away from his forehead. 

He lifted his head and moaned as the fingers kneaded into the back of his neck. All the blood in his body raced south. Lex soaped a wash cloth and Clark gradually stood, allowing Lex to run the cloth over his body, even between his legs. Clark's rosy, and now very erect cock was given a quick once over, before the shower spray shifted and Clark was treated to a face-full of water. He was being rinsed. 

Then the tap was turned off and Clark turned slowly, blinking water droplets from his eyelashes. The room wasn't spinning any more and, despite the ache in his cock, he felt warm and tired. Lex dried him off with a fluffy towel and helped him out of the shower so that he wouldn't fall. Clark took long, deep breaths trying to gain a sense of control. 

"Lex, what are you doing?" 

"I'm taking care of you, Clark," Lex replied softly, not looking up from where he was toweling Clark's calves and feet. "That's all I've ever wanted, you know. I just want to help take care of you." 

Clark stared down at Lex on the floor at his feet and felt the overwhelming urge to give it all up for this man, to walk away from destiny and truth, to just live for Lex--alien powers be damned. 

But that was the thing with alien powers--they didn't just go away. 

Lex rose and put his arm around Clark's waist. "Come on. Let's get you into the bed." 

Clark collapsed onto his mattress and covered his naked body with the soft blanket he'd slept under since he was a kid. Lex sat down next to him and brushed the wet hair off of Clark's forehead. Clark closed his eyes and shifted uncomfortably; his cock was throbbing. 

"Clark, it wasn't about the article." 

"I know, Lex. S'cause you love me." 

Lex's hand hitched in Clark's hair, but only for a moment. "Yes, Clark. I love you." 

Clark opened his eyes and smiled from his heart. "I love you so much, Lex. So much." 

Lex swallowed hard and nodded, his hand continuing to stroke Clark's forehead. Clark tried to remember what he'd been doing to get Lex to offer to suck him the night before because his cock really needed to be sucked right now. 

"Clark--I read the document that was open on your computer." 

Document? Computer? What about the pressing problem of his dick? Wasn't it much more important than any document on his computer? But Lex's face was deeply worried, so Clark frowned trying to remember. He'd been working on the article, but instead had typed up a bunch of stuff about love and lies--oh. 

"Yeah?" Clark swallowed, feeling suddenly much more sober. He started to sit up, but Lex pressed on his shoulders. 

"Yeah. You know, Clark, I've known for years now." 

Clark tried to smile like an idiot. That sometimes worked with Lex. "You've known what?" 

It didn't seem to be working tonight, though. 

Lex smiled a little indulgently. "Come on, Clark. I know that you're an ali--" 

Panic ripped through Clark's stomach and into his chest. 

"Shhhhhh!" Clark raised his hand to Lex's mouth. "Don't say it." Clark stroked his fingers over Lex's lips. "Please, don't say it. It's dangerous. You can't know. You could die. It's not--good. Just, please, don't say it, Lex." 

Lex kissed Clark's fingertips and then pulled Clark's hand away from his mouth. "But I do know, Clark. I've known for three and half years. And I'm still alive." 

"Lex--" 

"Shh. Clark, let's not talk about it anymore." 

Clark swallowed and nodded. Lex leaned over and kissed Clark's forehead before rising. "I'm going to go, now. You'll be okay. Call me tomorrow morning, all right?" 

He grabbed Lex's hand, pulling Lex back to sit on the bed. "No. Lex--" He took a deep breath and pressed Lex's palm to his aching cock. "Stay." 

Lex's eyes grew dark and hot, still he whispered, "You're drunk, Clark." 

"So? Stay." Besides, he wasn't that drunk, not any more. 

Lex bit his lip and looked at the floor and then he pulled his hand away from Clark's grip. 

"Stay," he tried one more time. 

Lex looked at Clark, eyes glowing with heat. Lex took a deep breath, closed his eyes and unbuttoned his pants. 

* * *

Lex's body was like every beautiful dream. It was sweet and hard, soft and strong. Clark's fingers trailed over every inch of exposed skin, mouth following his hand's lead. The hot, wet slide of Lex's dripping cock against his hip and Lex's warm, enveloping moans further ignited Clark's lust. 

Clark listened to the sounds of Lex's body, each heartbeat and rush of pulse, the rustle of each breath and he counted each vertebrae, each bone, each scar and freckle. 

"It's you." Clark whispered against the hard flank of Lex's hip, licking along the crevice of thigh and groin. 

"Me?" 

"Right here with me. It's you. Lex--I love you. I want to touch you everywhere." 

Lex shifted and pulled Clark up to kiss him again. "I want you so much, Clark. I want you to fuck me." 

Clark shook his head. "No. I want you inside of me, Lex." 

"Clark, you're drunk. I want to experience everything with you, but I never want either of us to doubt your consent." 

Clark laughed. "You're insane if you think I'd ever wonder about my consent." But he didn't want to talk any more so he kissed Lex again, slow, wet and hungry, trying to remember where Pete kept the condoms and lube in his bedroom. 

Lex moaned into Clark's mouth and reached down to jerk their cocks together, his strong hand squeezing and stroking hard. Clark bucked into the grip and felt himself hit the edge of control. He had to pull away and get the lube, or else he was going to come all over Lex and no one was going to get fucked. 

"Lex?" Clark tasted Lex's breath as he whispered against his lips. "I'm going to get something from Pete's room. I'll be right back." 

Lex didn't stop stroking their cocks and tossed his head back and forth on the pillow in denial of Clark's words. "Don't go, Clark. Just--God, so good." 

"I want it to be better." Clark stilled Lex's hand and chuckled at the low moan. "Let me get the stuff, Lex. I want to fuck you." 

Lex shuddered under him and fisted a hand in Clark's hair, pulled him down for a vicious, biting kiss. "Yes, fuck me." 

"I'll be right back." 

Clark used a touch of speed to get to Pete's room. Lex might know, but no need to flaunt it. The lingering buzz of alcohol was dull compared to the high of lust and need that Lex inspired in him and his hands shook as he pilfered condoms and lube from Pete's nightstand. 

Clark stopped in the doorway to his bedroom and stared. 

Lex stretched out on his bed, pale and hairless, body twisted up in Clark's dark blue sheets and his neck marred with teeth marks and red love bites. His chest heaving and his cock flexing with each beat of his heart. And all for Clark. Because of Clark. 

"Jesus, Lex. Why the fuck did we wait so long?" 

"I don't know Clark, but why the fuck are we waiting right now?" Lex's voice was so rough that it sounded like he'd already been screaming for hours. Clark wondered what it would sound like tomorrow morning. 

Clark grinned at the growl of impatience that Lex let loose. "Get over here, Kent. Don't make me come and get you. You won't like your punishment." 

Clark pounced on the bed, straddling Lex's hips and leaning in to kiss his mouth hard. "I have a feeling I'd _love_ my punishment." 

Lex chuckled and licked the smile off of Clark's face, sucked Clark's tongue and bucked up demandingly. Clark pulled back and looked at the condom. 

"Fuck." 

Lex frowned. "What?" 

"It's--God! Why the hell don't I keep any of these around!" Clark bit down on his cheek to try to keep the tears of frustration from coming to his eyes. 

Lex grabbed the condom from his hand and examined the package. "Oh." 

"I'm sorry, Lex. I--" Clark looked away a little embarrassed. "I don't really ever--and so, I, um, don't keep my own--" Clark indicated his cock "--and, that's obviously not gonna work." 

Lex's hands stroked Clark's thighs soothingly. "Hey, Clark. It's okay." 

Clark collapsed next to Lex and he fought back unreasonable tears. It wasn't like there weren't other things they could do, it wasn't as though anal sex was the end all and be all of-- 

"Clark, I'm clean. Have you been tested?" 

Clark turned to Lex and ran a hand down his chest, cupping his cock. "I've been with exactly one guy and he was a virgin, too." 

Lex bucked against Clark's hand. "I've been with a few more than that--" 

Clark kissed him to shut up. He didn't want to know. "Not now. I don't want to think of them now. Just us." Clark ran a hand over Lex's scalp, enjoying the small shiver than ran over Lex's body. "Screw Pete's too-small condoms." 

Lex grinned. "Poor Pete." 

Clark chuckled. "Now--where were we? I was on top of you--" Clark moved a little "--like this, right?" 

Lex smirked. Clark kissed Lex's throat, sucking another mark there, up high where there was no way Lex could cover it. Want, take, mark, own. 

"Let's see. I think your legs were spread--" Lex opened his thighs and Clark dropped between them, rubbing his cock hard against Lex' s "--like that. Yeah." Clark flipped open the lube and squeezed several clear drops onto his fingers. "Lex?" 

"If you even fucking ask me if I'm sure, I'm going to get up and leave right now." 

Clark smiled. "Don't tempt the drunk man. Right now it seems like a really funny idea to ask, just to see what you'd do." 

Lex groaned. "You're not that drunk any more. I think that special metabolism of yours has cleared it out of your system." 

"Are you going to talk or are we going to do this?" 

"Clark?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Shut the fuck up." 

"You, too." 

Lex jerked as Clark plunged two fingers into his ass. "Jesus!" 

"Nope. Just me." 

Lex rolled his eyes but bit down on his lip rather than speak, panting as his ass spasmed around Clark's fingers, clenching against the sudden intrusion. 

Clark knew he'd been a little too fast, so he nuzzled Lex's neck and kissed his nipples in apology. Lex's cock flexed against Clark's stomach with every movement of Clark's fingers. 

"You're so tight." 

"Been a long time." 

"Relax for me, Lex. I can't wait much longer." 

Lex took a deep breath and shuddered on the exhale. Clark licked the dusky nipples again and then trailed his tongue over Lex's sternum, down to his navel, lifting Lex's right leg up, spreading him open. 

Clark pulled back and looked at his fingers in Lex's tight ass and smiled hotly; he met Lex's eyes and then lowered his head to lick the pre-come pooled on Lex's stomach. His breath against Lex's cock caused it to twitch and arch toward Clark's mouth. Still twisting and working his fingers, Clark sucked the head of Lex's cock into his mouth, relishing the salty taste steadily leaking from it. 

Lex cursed and grabbed Clark's head with both hands, attempting to fuck Clark's mouth. "So good, Clark. God." 

Clark smiled around his mouthful and released it with a pop. He'd fucked one guy, but he'd given a lot of blow jobs once upon a time in Metropolis. He was glad that his past humiliation could pay off in some way, and Lex's moans and groans as Clark licked his shaft and sucked his balls felt like absolution for the way Clark had gained his experience. 

Mouthing lower, Clark chuckled at Lex's involuntary kick against Clark's shoulders as Clark licked the taut rim of Lex's ass. Clark's tongue traced where his fingers entered Lex and the whimpers from above just drove him forward, pressing his tongue in next to his fingers to fuck Lex's ass simultaneously. 

Lex's heels dug into Clark's shoulders. Clark pulled his fingers out, spread Lex's ass cheeks wide and rimmed him hard. Lex squirmed trying to get away from the intense sensation, but Clark held him with an easy, though bruising, grip on Lex's hips. "God, I'm going to come, Clark! Please! Stop!" 

But Clark wanted him to come, wanted to make Lex lose control all the way, wanted to feel him clench around his tongue. He thrust his tongue inside and sucked hard against Lex's hole, gratified to hear Lex's wail and feel his ass tighten rhythmically, insane with need at the musky aroma of Lex's come and the sweet taste of Lex's core in his mouth. 

Lex's pulse pounded in Clark's ears and he kissed his way over Lex's balls and cock, licking up all of the come he could find as Lex's hands tangled in his hair, urging him up for deep, long kiss. 

Clark murmured against Lex's lips, "I love you. Everything. Your taste, your scent. You make me crazy." 

Lex, limp and eyes glazed, only whimpered. 

Clark laughed against Lex's throat. He pulled back and slicked his cock, lifting Lex's legs up onto his shoulders. He closed his eyes briefly, taking a steadying breath, and he swallowed again, loving the taste of Lex in his mouth. Clark positioned himself, holding his cock in his fist, and teased Lex's hole. 

Opened his eyes, met Lex's intense gaze and-- 

Pushed. 

Lex's eyes flew wide and hot, hot, tight, _fucking heaven_ clenched the head of Clark's cock. Lex blinked rapidly and the low sound from his throat was obviously laced with pain. Clark rocked gently, biting his lip hard to keep from ramming forward into the sweetest, tightest body he'd ever imagined. Lex's legs twitched on Clark's shoulders and Lex's eyes rolled back into his head. 

Clark pushed harder and gained another three inches into Lex's body, the hurt-sounding whimper stilling his thrusts instantly. 

Lex tossed his head back and forth on the pillow and his hands clenched convulsively in the sheets. "More." 

Clark couldn't breathe around the sensation spiraling through his body from his cock, but he thrust hard and jerked as his balls grazed Lex's ass. God. God. God. He blinked the sweat from his eyes and held on tight as Lex's ass clenched around him. 

"So big, Clark. Jesus." Lex's voice was tight and rough. Clark rubbed his hands soothingly along Lex's thighs. 

"I can pull out." 

"I'll fucking kill you." 

Lex squirmed on Clark's cock and, suddenly, Clark was so close that he cried out with the struggle to keep from coming. He couldn't wait. He had to move. He leaned over Lex and, as he pulled his cock out until just the head remained inside Lex's body, he murmured, "You're going to kill me anyway. I can't control myself." 

He slammed back in and Lex arched against him, meeting his thrust and throwing his arms back to clutch the headboard of Clark's small bed. 

"Fuck me, Clark. Give me everything you've got," Lex said through clenched teeth, eyes screwed shut, head thrown back. 

Clark would never do that. 'Everything' would result in very bad, unsexy things, but he could give this. 

Clark shifted his angle and thrust again, hard and fast, in and out, rapid strokes that had Lex alternately bucking to meet him and scrambling to get away. Clark was steady and sure, he felt the tug, the sensation building in his toes, his hands, his spine, knew that the moment wouldn't last. But seeing Lex under him, taking his thrusts, feeling Lex opening to take in more--unbelievable, amazing, astonishing, fucking perfect. 

And on one particularly deep thrust, when Clark bottomed out so far inside of Lex that he could feel Lex's heartbeat on each inch of his cock, Lex lifted, arched and came again with a harsh shout, his cock pulsing in hard, short bursts, his ass clenching Clark so tightly, milking him. 

One more stroke, one more deep joining and the world was gone, only the feeling bursting over his body, the jerking, shaking pleasure of orgasm, hot in his veins and so good that he was afraid. Clark shouted to reduce the intensity of the orgasm, but his cock continued to jerk inside of Lex for long, long moments until he finally collapsed. 

Lex's heartbeat under his ear was the first thing that Clark heard over the rush in his ears. Strong, beautiful heartbeats that pushed blood through Lex's frail body. So frail. A sudden panic gripped Clark as he realized how much control he'd lost and he pulled back terrified to see the damage he'd done. 

Lex smiled blearily at him and muttered, "You're heavy." 

Clark whispered, "Sorry." He pulled his cock free as gently as he could and Lex's moan increased his fear that he'd been too rough. He lifted Lex's legs to expose his ass and examine Lex's hole with his fingers. No blood. 

"I'm okay, Clark. You didn't hurt me." 

Clark nodded but switched to x-ray. Everything inside looked okay, too. He swallowed against the strange sudden lump in his throat. Lex was okay. It was okay. 

"Clark, I'm okay. Come here." 

Clark nodded again, dumbly, and ducked his head to look at Lex's ass again, just to make sure. He needed to be more careful. He couldn't let go like that. He knew better. 

"Goddamn it." Lex struggled into a half-sitting position, grabbed a handful of Clark's hair and pulled him up into a kiss. Clark relaxed into Lex's arms and let Lex reassure him. "It was good, Clark. In case you missed it, I came so hard I saw stars. You don't need to worry." 

Clark nodded and ran his hands over Lex's body, fingering the valleys of his hips, palming the planes of his stomach. He wasn't so sure, but that seemed like a conversation for another day. Right now he was naked, sated, in love and loved in return. He could wait to worry. 

He rolled onto his side, spooned Lex in close and whispered, "I love you." 

Lex whispered back, "We're idiots. We could've been having sex this good for years. Jesus." 

Clark hummed softly in response and was nearly asleep when Lex said it. 

"I love you, too. I'll never let anyone hurt you." 

* * *

Clark woke up, cramped and uncomfortable. He heard the strange disturbance again. Harsh banging on his bedroom door. 

"Goddamn it, Clark! Let me in!" 

Pete. 

He sat up and met Lex's startled eyes. Lex. In his bed. Naked. 

Clark grinned and Lex smiled back, a genuine smile that filled his eyes. 

"Pete--go away. I've got company." 

"I don't care! You don't steal a guy's condoms, man! It's not cool!" 

Clark cursed and stumbled from the bed as Lex chuckled. He opened the door just a crack and saw an irate Pete glaring at him. 

He tried to look pitiful. "I'm sorry, Pete. I needed them." 

Pete rolled his eyes. "Dude, _I_ needed them! She just left. The hottest girl _ever_. But _no_ , you finally get--" Pete broke off, his eyes suddenly lighting up. "Hey. _Hey!_ , Clark, man--" He shifted into a loud whisper, "Way to go!" Pete raised his hands in a victory gesture and Clark sighed. 

"Pete--" 

"Who is she?" 

"Ummmm--" 

Pete frowned. He narrowed his eyes. "Oh my God. Lana was right." 

"Pete--" 

Pete looked entirely grossed out. "Fuck. You stole my condoms to have sex with a guy?" 

He lowered his eyes. "Don't, Pete." 

"Lex. It's Lex. I should've known." 

"Pete." He wondered if he was going to be able to say more than just Pete's name any time soon. 

"I don't want to know. Not right now." Pete took a deep breath. "I'll be okay, Clark. Don't look so worried." Pete backed away from the door. "I'm going to go now. I'm going to go watch porn. Porn that has girls with huge tits and shaved pussies. I'm going to jerk off and I'm not going to think about what you did in here last night. Then, later, when I've had time to adjust, I'll make breakfast for you and Lex. Because I'm the coolest best friend ever." 

Clark couldn't help but laugh a little at that. 

"But no details. Ever." 

"Pete--" 

"Tits. Pussies. Boobs--" Pete turned on his heels and walked down the hall chanting girl-parts. 

He closed the door and turned to face Lex who was propped up on an elbow watching with an amused expression. 

"Not exactly how I planned to tell him." 

"Oh? I thought you were quite eloquent." 

Clark rolled his eyes. "Smart-ass." 

Lex sat up a little, not entirely hiding his wince. "As much as I'd love to eat Wheaties poured into a bowl by Pete, I think I'm going to get going--" 

Clark's stomach knotted. "Why?" 

Lex smiled softly. "Don't panic, Clark. I just want to get some clean clothes. And I think you should stay at my place tonight, because as quaint as this bed of yours is, it's a little small for both of us to sleep comfortably." 

He relaxed and smiled. "Yeah. That's probably a good idea." 

Lex stood slowly. "I'm going to shower." 

Clark watched Lex's ass as he strode across the room. He licked his lips and felt his cock stir. 

Lex paused in the doorway, turned and smiled. "Aren't you going to join me, Clark?" 

* * *

Epilogue: 

*Two Years Later:* 

Clark was running late again. He was always late. Why was it that he didn't take Lex up on the offer for that car again? 

He stumbled over a subway grate and spilled coffee on his shirt. Cursing under his breath, he mopped at the stain with his tie--and wasn't that just a brilliant move? 

The news room was bustling and he didn't look up from his shirt as he made his way toward his desk. 

"Spill, Smallville." 

Clark sighed. "Coffee, again, Lois." 

"No--why is Luthor here?" 

Clark looked up and saw Lex lounging against Clark's desk, hands in pockets and a smirk firmly fixed on his face. 

"I--I don't know." Clark smiled at Lex and picked up the pace, leaving Lois a few feet behind. He drew close, but not too close, and whispered, "Heya, sexy, weren't you naked and in bed the last time I saw you?" 

Lex smiled and ducked his head a little. He looked up and met Clark's eyes with an intense expression. "I talked to your Mom last night, Clark. And your Dad." 

Clark blinked. "You talked to _Dad_?" 

"Yes. I wanted to clear this with them first." 

Clark frowned. It had been a long time since he felt the need to check with his parents before accepting gifts from Lex. "Whatever you've bought me, Lex, I don't think they're the ones you need to convince." 

"I know, Clark." 

Lex looked around the newsroom then and Clark glanced around, too. The number of eyes on them wasn't too unusual. It _was_ a newsroom and Clark _was_ dating Metropolis' media darling, Lex Luthor. 

"You know that I'm planning a run at the governor's seat next year." 

Clark nodded. 

"What I wanted to convince your parents of, convince you of is--" Lex, in a graceful move that only he could pull off, slid down to kneel on the floor. "--would you do me the honor of becoming my partner in every way, of joining me as my spouse in the governor's mansion when I win? Clark, will you marry me?" Lex held out his hand, palm up. It held a simple platinum band. 

Clark stared at him. Lex stared back. 

He heard the stunned murmurs around him but it was only when he felt Lois' foot kicking him in the calf that he realized that he hadn't answered. He reached down and pulled Lex up, amused to see that Lex's face had gone from confident to vaguely frightened in the space of his silence. 

He leaned in close and whispered in Lex's ear, "Of course, I'll marry you, goof." 

"Good, you had me scared for a second. I thought I'd miscalculated." 

"Nope." Clark looked around at the photographers jockeying for position and shook his head. Leave it to Lex to turn this into a media event. 

Lex grinned. "Okay, then, Clark--want to kiss me for the cameras?" 

He laughed, leaning in until his lips nearly brushed Lex's. "Tongue?" 

"Of course. Let's make this as scandalous as possible." 

"Don't tempt the drunk man, Lex." 

"You're not drunk." 

Clark whispered against Lex's lips, "I am, but not on alcohol." 

* * *

The End. 


End file.
